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RAISING THE SOUL: THE TRUE WORK OF PARENTHOOD

Introduction



We often talk about "raising children," but what does it truly mean? Feeding them food, property, or education is not raising. True raising happens when we cultivate the soul, when we guide, inspire, and pull forth what lies latent within them. A child mirrors the depth of the parent’s own inner growth. Raising requires intention, alignment, and nurturing the unseen dimensions of the child’s being. 

Essence Before Manifestation

Our own souls grow from essence → manifestation. Similarly, a child's inner world requires the same path. Teaching external forms first — university, rules, even prayers — without nourishing the soul is like watering the leaves before the roots have grown. Begin with awareness, reflection, and alignment before expecting performance. Inner alignment precedes external accomplishment, and true raising honors this flow.

Parenting as Self-Cultivation

To raise a child effectively, we must first raise ourselves. Through personal spiritual practice, inner alignment, and awareness, guidance flows naturally. Our presence, actions, and energy teach far more than instructions ever could. This is the true power of example, where children absorb the values and inner state of their parents rather than just external rules. Spiritual growth cannot be transferred mechanically; it must radiate from being.

Modern Misconceptions

Focusing solely on feeding, scheduling, and homework supervision.
Reducing parents to daily managers rather than spiritual guides.
Expecting children to perform externally without cultivating inner alignment first.
Assuming outward discipline substitutes inner development.
Neglecting the cultivation of intuition, reflection, and spiritual awareness in favor of mechanical routines. True raising cannot be outsourced; it begins within the parent.

Patience and Spiritual Flow

Parenting reflects your own spiritual work. Consequences, guidance, and instruction flow naturally once the parent is aligned. Patience is essential; the child’s growth mirrors the cultivation of the parent. External actions follow internal transformation. When we cultivate our own essence first, children follow intuitively, rather than through imposed structure. Allow inner work to manifest first; the rest unfolds naturally. This is the true essence of raising the soul.

Summary

Tarbiyyah is self-cultivation first → manifestation through example → subtle guidance as consequences.

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